I've been at school for two weeks now, and I feel as if I already know more about college than I did in my first few days here. The things that once seemed daunting and unbearable are now achievable, conquerable. Here's my (unfinished) list of things to know before leaving home and while you're at school!
- College changes people. For as many new people as you're going to meet, there's still this undeniable urge to call your friends from home and tell them to take the next train to visit you. What you come to realize, though, is that it's not that your friends from home don't love you anymore, but everyone is crafting their new life at their own schools. People are becoming who they always wanted to be, and sometimes, those versions are as unfamiliar as the people you met two days ago during a lecture on anthropology. Change is a part of life, and you either accept it or let go.
- Your parents will miss you more than they expected, too. While you're out making friends and diving into this new independent life, your parents are living the same lives they've had for the past however many years. Now, though, they've got one extra bedroom and an empty seat at the dinner table. My dad emailed me about a week after I moved in and said, "I just wanted you to know that I think about you constantly and miss you terribly." Cherish your last summer with your parents; make time for them while you're planning your next chapter. Remember to call your family at least twice a week and more, if you can. You've gone eighteen years seeing these people almost every day; don't become a stranger to the people who raised you.
- The best moments are the unexpected. It's 1:30 (in the morning) on a Sunday night, but there aren't classes the next day, so half of the floor is in the lounge. Someone brought cookies in while another room offered their milk. Glasses and mugs came in pairs from rooms along the hall. Someone starts playing old songs from when we were all in middle school and for a little bit, people who barely know each other are sharing in this moment of bittersweet nostalgia. Don't dismiss the nights like these, because parties can only last for so long, but a night with this kind of feeling can last for so much longer.
- Join clubs you actually want to be a part of. I feel like, in high school, clubs were this gateway to college. Everyone wanted to seem well-rounded and cultured. We played sports we didn't love in the hopes of one day getting a scholarship and joined clubs to save the world when we really weren't even sure how to save ourselves. In college, sign up for anything and everything that interests you, but do it for you, not for some chance down the road to tell someone how involved you were during your freshman year. You'll have time to network, but how often will you get to host your own radio show on the campus station?
- Umbrellas are completely necessary. Don't say you'll buy one once you get to school, because you'll forget and then it'll be pouring for so long that you're convinced Noah's built a second ark. Also, check the weather in the morning, and if there is any chance of rain, just bring the darn umbrella. Better safe than sorry, and as always, better dry than soaking wet.
- Don't let the small things that seem big bring you down. You will miss your house and your dog. You'll want to spend the night in your best friend's backyard around a bonfire talking about life. You will miss your younger sister who's starting high school without you there to chaperone her. There will be nights when you just stay in bed and work on homework while everyone else seems to be going out or falling in love or finding out who they're supposed to be. Everything in college seems so big and great and amazing, but everyone is terrified of so much more than they'll ever say. Don't worry about that time you got drunk and told the boy who lives one room over that he was cute. Don't let a public speaking class keep you up at night, because you can't think of a single issue you want to get up there and talk about for five minutes.
- Take time for yourself and have fun. Remember to breathe. The things that seem daunting now will be familiar in a few weeks. You'll find your way around campus and make friends that you actually like. Spend nights in, if you want to, and don't feel as if you need to constantly be out and about. Remember to do your homework and wash your clothes and keep your side of the room somewhat presentable. Do things that interest you, and stop wasting time with people or events that don't.
Love you all!
